


The Risks We Take

by valis2



Category: Riptide (TV)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-18
Updated: 2009-03-18
Packaged: 2017-10-07 22:55:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/70095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/valis2/pseuds/valis2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick dreams of mud.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Risks We Take

It took a moment for Nick to register that he was in his bed, not choking on mud, not suffocating under a tidal wave of heat and jungle. His limbs were heavy and uncooperative. He shifted, panting.

A touch on his arm. He started, blinking, half-formed terrors shaping in his mind, but it was Cody, golden and warm, driving back the darkness. A sob escaped his throat, and he sat up shakily. Cody gathered him into his arms, making sleepy noises of comfort.

Tears slid from his eyes, and he clung to Cody like a drowning man. Cody's hands soothed, and gradually he went slack, his breathing relaxing, his body unwinding.

"Want to tell me about it?"

Nick hesitated, then shook his head.

"Nick, this is the third night in a row," said Cody, sounding worried. "Maybe talking about it would help."

He began trembling again, thinking of the smell, the awful, cloying smell, and he felt Cody's arms tighten around him.

"Must be bad," said Cody, his hand reaching up to stroke the back of his neck.

Nick was still for a long moment, thinking. "I was in the Mimi," he said quietly.

"If you don't want--"

"Everything went to hell," he continued. "I had to take her down. But the ground...it looked...wrong. Flat and brown. As she dropped, I--I saw--" He took in a breath, and the trembling increased.

"It's okay," murmured Cody, stroking his back.

"Mud," said Nick. "Everything. Mud. She came down like a ton of bricks, and I got out, but she was sinking. Fast."

"Must have been scary, losing the Mimi like that."

"Yeah," said Nick, swallowing hard. "I couldn't...there was nothing for me to grab onto, there was nowhere to go--"

Cody tensed. "You...went down, too?"

"Yeah, but it was worse than that," said Nick roughly. "I was halfway under when I heard your voice--inside Mimi." Tears flowed freely again.

Cody didn't say anything, just held him as he cried. _The mud, sucking him under, Cody's desperate cries for release--_ He shuddered, holding still, trying desperately to banish the sound from his ears. _Not real. Didn't happen. We're both fine._ The shaking wouldn't stop.

"Do you think you might be scared of us?" asked Cody, sounding deep in thought.

"What?" asked Nick, pushing away from him.

"No, really," said Cody, putting a hand on his arm. "I mean, it's only been a month since...well, since we started this...you know, _this_, and maybe you're feeling overwhelmed."

Nick blinked and wiped his eyes. "Cody, you know as well as I do that I want this."

"I'm not saying you don't want it." Cody's gaze was direct. "I'm saying that maybe somewhere deep down, you're scared of this. You're scared that it's too much, and you'll drag us both down."

"Drag us both down...into what?" asked Nick. "Mud?"

"No, not mud." Cody looked exasperated. "This isn't easy, what we have. I mean, some parts of it are easy," he blushed, "but other parts...I mean, you always put your whole heart into everything you do, Nick, and maybe, secretly, your head is afraid of this. If something goes wrong, we stand to lose more than most people."

Nick closed his eyes. _The agency. The heat between us. My best friend._ "When you put it that way..."

"It makes sense that you'd be dreaming of it. We're taking a big risk."

Nick raised his hand and traced the edge of Cody's face with his fingertips. "It's a risk I want to take, though," he said softly. "What we have is something most people don't even get to dream about." He leaned forward and kissed Cody, slow and sweet and tender, his hand sliding behind Cody's neck. "I don't understand why my head would have a problem with that."

"You're missing the point," said Cody, his own hand reaching up to entwine in Nick's. "You see the logic, but your subconscious doesn't."

"Well, I wish it would catch up." Nick took a deep breath. "We could both use the sleep."

Cody chuckled, drawing closer. "Yeah." They kissed again, with growing passion. "If you keep this up," said Cody, a little breathless, "we'll be missing out on more..."

"Wouldn't be the first time," said Nick, grinning.

"Won't be the last," promised Cody, laying him down on the bed. "Maybe you need a little extra physical--uh--exertion...I bet you'd sleep like a baby afterward." Cody's hand trailed across his ribs, setting off sparks.

"Sounds like my kind of remedy," growled Nick.


End file.
